John Barnes

On Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing, John Barnes performed a superb salsa to get top marks from the judges. Under pressure from previous poor showings it was a great comeback.

The most memorable moment of his footballing career was this incredible goal for England against Brazil when he just a young lad. Although he played many more times for England and became a Liverpool player I never felt he fulfilled his potential. He never scored a goal of similar quality and hardly ever showed the same pace and power. Was he lazy? Was he burdened with too much expectation following this goal? Or was he simply not that good?

National Joke

West Ham beat Derby 5-0 at Pride Park. We're bottom of the league. We haven't scored for nine hours. Our goal difference is minus 26. Can it get any worse? Well, our next game is against Chelsea. I can't imagine what the score's going to be, plus we've games against Man U, Liverpool and Blackburn very soon.

Whenever I wear my Derby jacket in London people look at me with pity. We've now been labelled the worst team in the history of the Premiership.

Is there any hope? Well, there's always hope. We've been promised money to spend in January. Plus, there are other poor teams in the Premier League. But Billy Davies will need to perform another miracle. Best bet. Prepare for the Championship.

Smoking and Snogging

Have been hanging around a lot of French railways stations over the past couple of days and have noticed a lot of this going on. I guess it's what makes France famous and why this song became so popular.

Dijon

I arrived this evening in the town of Dijon, an hour and a half south of Paris via the TGV. Had time for a brief walk around the very pretty town centre. The most interesting place I came across was the Maille Boutique, a posh shop full of fancy esoteric mustards, which includes fresh mustard available on tap.

Was taken out for a fabulous dinner. It's a real gastronomic region and everything we ordered was delicious, including of course the local Burgundy wine. Busy day tomorrow, then back for another evening in Paris meeting up with an old mate.

I know travelling can be a bit a pain, but it is nice being in France.

Sexy Car Adverts

I've quite enjoyed the this recent ad for the Audi R8. Very confident, relaxed and of course with a great looking car. It's obviously trying to imitate alcohol brands (Guinness, Grolsch, any malt whisky) by trying to make a virtue over slowness and craftsmanship.

In recent years I've really admired the Honda ads, particularly this one, which again focuses on the intricacies of the car.

I still prefer the Honda ad to the Audi one as it's much more original and engaging. In any case, they're both better than that bloody gorilla.

Ron Hill Run Official Results

The results are here. I finished 253rd out of 259! Not very impressive. Will look to smash my personal best at the next leg on 23rd Dec.

Ratatouille

After my 10km run I decided to take the girls to see Ratatouille at the Streatham Odeon, which is another Pixar classic.

Both the girls really liked it. The animation is very impressive and it was easy for adults to enjoy, particularly if you're a bit of a foodie. However, I did think it was a bit too long and the story lost its way at times. It's definitely worth seeing, but don't think its quite as good as the Incredibles

The Ron Hill Surrey Classic Series

Today I ran in a 10km race at Nonsuch Park near Cheam. The second of a 3 race series called the Ron Hill Surrey Classic. It's been years since I've ran this distance, but thanks to my running partner Tony, I managed to finish it. It was a pretty serious race with some very quick club runners and amazingly I wasn't last. I think there was 1 other runner behind me.

The last time I run seriously was at least 12 years ago when I worked on the Buitoni brand and we sponsored the Great North Run Pasta Party in Newcastle. I remember Daley Thompson and a young unknown Kelly Holmes were guests of honour.

The next 10km run I'm entered for is on the 23rd December, so will need to take it easy on the run-up to Christmas. The organiser of the race is based in Belper in Derbyshire. Click here for information on other races.

My Next Training Event

If anyone is interested in learning how to plan and facilitate creative workshops, my next event is on 11th January. Click here for more details.

Halloween is Bigger then Bonfire Night

Every year Halloween seems to get a higher profile. More kids on the street, more commercialisation, more hype.

I was in Paris on the 31st and saw hardly any pumpkins, scarey masks, etc so get the impression that its a UK thing.

When I was a kid, Bonfire Night was the big thing, but it seems to be much less of a big event nowadays, at least in our household.

Is This Genius?

I recently read about this new invention called the Shewee - a portable urinating device for women, described on their website as:

"a moulded plastic funnel that provides women with a simple, private and hygienic method of urinating without removing clothes whilst standing AND sitting."

What a bizarre idea. Nowadays, women drink beer, get pissed regularly, run big businesses, enjoy watching rugby. Now they're trying to wee standing up. Is nothing sacred?

I'm in Paris

And just to prove it, here's a picture I took tonight of the Arc de Triomphe. Was a trip down memory lane for me as I went to see the road I used to live in 1991 - rue Brey - just near here.

I've not been back since I left to returned to London and it hasn't changed much. Ate at my old local restaurant and the food was still great.

I always remembered that French advertising used to consist of a naked woman holding the product as seductively as possible. Even today, when Orangina decide to feature cartoon animals, they try to make them as sexy as possible.

Long Fu Girls Reunion 2007

This is the 8th year that we've had a reunion of the girls from the Long Yan orphanage who now live in the UK.

The girls are 9 and 10 now and this year we stayed in a lovely old house near Monmouth in South Wales. Highlight of the event was the Talent Show organised by the girls where Lia was the star turn with her song from 'Annie'.

Next year Scotland. Can't wait.

Posh Hotel

Spent the day at The Hempel a very exclusive boutique hotel near Paddington. Very nice but a bit too cool and minimal for me. White walls, white flooring and staff wearing black.

Apparently Posh Spice was staying there. Didn't see her though.

Remember This?

I know the Rugby World Cup was really gripping, but there were few moments of magic. I can still remember this Gareth Edwards try in 1973 playing for the Barabarians against the All Blacks which is often called the greatest try of all time. Still brings a smile to your face.

The Dragon's Den

After Nigella, I watched the Dragon's Den, which was compelling but in a different way. I know its only television, but the dragons really are awful people. Aggressive, arrogant, incredibly condescending, bullying these poor desperate people, looking for a lifeline. i don't think I've ever seen Duncan Ballantine invest a penny.

However, there is a way to succeed and get your money.

1. Say you've had a poor, tough upbringing. The dragons hate posh people and love an underdog.
2. Know your numbers. If you get lost in your finances, they'll kill you.
3. Flatter the judges. Give them something that's personalised - however tacky - and it will play to their egos.
4. Never ask for too much. They won't risk more than £100 000 on any single investment
5. Be prepared to give up 30-40% of your company.
6. Don't waffle. They can't concentrate for too long.
7. Ask for money at the right time. Show you've sold something already. They won't back an unproven start-up

Nigella is Mad

I hardly ever watch TV, but with Karen and the kids away for half term, I tuned into 'Nigella Express' and came to the conclusion that she's barking mad.

She keeps saying 'if, like me, you find that..etc' as if anyone who's watching has a lifestyle that remotely resembles hers. Catching black cabs to Waitrose, people dropping round and expecting a slap-up meal, a pantry the size of a bedroom. Also the way she tore that chicken apart with her hands was like a horror movie. I'm sure her recipes don't conform to government guidlines on healthy eating. Condensed milk, peanut butter, chocolate and Haagen Dazs ice cream for pudding and she's SO greedy, diving into the fridge at every opportunity.

Having said all that, it's all very entertaining and will try and watch her next week and I do agree with her about tinned pears.

We Should Have Won

No, I'm not referring to the rugby. It was the Derby's inability to beat Fulham on Saturday. Still, we kept a clean sheet and are no longer bottom of the league.

Craven Cottage is a nice ground to visit. It has a lot of character, there's a view over the river, it's small enough to be close to the pitch and there's a big away fans section. As ever, the Derby away fans were loud and passionate. One day the team may reward us with a goal.

Great Ideas

A lot of people I know are talking about the Radion 4 Show Genius, which is the funniest show around at the moment. It really does highlight the fact that there is little difference between genius and madness.

If you love new ideas, here's a couple of good sources. Idea a day. Where original ideas can be sent to you on a daily basis. Springwise a database of recently launched products and services picked up from different parts of the world.

Smiths of Smithfield

This is a great place to meet for breakfast. Was there this morning and had a really nice bacon sarnie.